Friday, January 23, 2009

After 3 Hours, Area Woman Makes it Out of the House


Local woman SC heaved a sigh of relief yesterday when, after preparing for over three hours, she finally managed to make it out of the house. "I just knew it was possible!" she exclaimed, "I've been training for a while, and it's just so fulfilling that it finally paid off." SC reports that she had a number of errands planned for the day, each requiring different preparation and materials to be carefully loaded into the car.

"What really slowed me down was looking for my bank account number in my files," she admits, "wouldn't it be wonderful if someday someone invented a way that this material could be placed in a drawer in some kind of logical manner that would help anybody who wanted to find it?"

Reputable scientists have issued a statement that this kind of "organization" is a relatively unknown phenomenon that would require an investment of at least 3.2 billion dollars over a period of 5 years to even begin to get a clue about how this might be accomplished.

Despite her statement regarding the allegedly obscure bank account number that prolonged her departure, however, allegations have surfaced that in actuality SC spent an unknown amount of time doing online activity as well as writing a copious and comprehensive master list of errands and related activities. It was apparently this activity that consumed most of her time, as well as what is often characterized as "general futzing around".

1 comment:

  1. OMG! Are you sure you weren't writing this about my life? Usually, I am sabotaged by myself putting my keys in the "best place possible" and end up running around for 20 minutes trying to figure out why they weren't where I left them...only to find I'd left them in the lock...